at the pharmacy fillin’ up a prescription
I'll spare the detail but somethin’ is itchin’
back to the counter when they call my name
then I got hit like a stroke to the brain
in a white lab coat was a first class dame
finest bitch I ever saw with a tag for her name

cheeks rosy like beets, lashes like a urchin,
shadow creepin’ up to her brows, eyes sparklin’,
chicklet white teeth, hair big, curls pearchin’,
but it all got better when I looked under her chin

DAYUM BITCH!
big lips to chat
but I see under these you got tits to match
poppin’ out that lab coat like a zit on the back
of a kid jerkin’ it to his dad's girlie mag

SHIT !I'm about to lose my wits, how'd ya
fasten them clasps round them lady twists,
now its early in the morning as your fine ass sits
don't you got a warnin’ case your uniform splits? OW!

that button'd done render blind
any unsuspecting soul waitin’ up in the line
got juggs like these, them dumps must be fine,
stand up baby girl, show us what you got BEHIND.


FOG HORN SOUND

I done froze in my tracks.

when the Talk about the titties, the bitch is stacked
but she got an ass lookin’ like a plate with a crack
everything's looking fine when your mind's on her rack, but
she a top heavy bitch, ain’t no meat in the back!

CHORUS:
up top bitch is fine, got a poppin’ rack
but god help yo ass if you hit it from the back
fatty patties ‘tween the waist and the legs she lacks
get yo ass to the booty bank fill up the slack

I said hows it make you feel to have it all on top?
ass all deflated, tits about to pop
if you need some help well I know of a shop
that can stop ya from walkin’ ‘round lookin’ like a lollypop

bitch looked at me, a tear in her eye,
put her hand round my hand and she pulled me aside,
“help me! help me please!” she cried
“put some junk in my trunk, plump up my back side!”

so we popped next door to the local dive
right to the kitchen straight for the deep fryer
'splained our situation, gotta make the booty wider
got a few jars of lard to put inside her

and we hit up a couple more establishments,
for some lard for the lady ass match her tits,
got a shit ton of junk so her top half fits
with the parts on the bottom on the side where she sits

CHORUS:
Ain’t no junk in her jeans got her momma to thank
if you hit it from behind ain't shit to spank
so we takin’ that lard in a big old tank,
gotta pump up the rump at the booty bank

so we get on the bus, lard in hand,
sit on the bus, fine bitches don't stand,
big tits on the bus, ass in her hands,
10 minutes on the bus, last step in the plan

I ain't never seen a sadder sight on any city block
full of skinny booty'd bitches, asses looking like they're rocks,
like Calvin Kline ad we stood in shock,
rows of skinny hoes piled up like they're starved livestock

one bitch had hips like a Nubian queen
and an ass that was flat like a magazine
another girl had wig that was big as a bush
distractin’ attention from her concave tush

yeah. and an out of work table dancer
who sadly lost a cheek to a bout of ass cancer
then a young actress in hi heeled boots
tryin to fill up her baggy cat woman suit

finally we were next in line!
I looked at the door and gave her a smile,
you're booty'll be big in a little while,
and she went into the bank and opened up her file.

CHORUS:

They pumpin’ junk in her trunk, fillin’ up her dumps
ain't gonna be no chump once she pump up her lumps
stuffin’ fat in her back, fixin’ up what she lack
trust your ass to the bootie bank, they'll pick up the slack!

DAYUM!
I ain't never seen an ass like that!
I mean, I ain't never ever ever seen an ass that fat.
about a hour in the past it was small and flat,
now it's creepin round the block like an alley cat.

I mean, that's a ass to remember for life,
that's a ass to keep yo man away from if you a wife
that's a ass you climb mountains for you suffer strife,
an ass like that you see once in yo whole life.

so I approached lil’ lady and gave her my arm,
finally baby girl, your body matches yo charm,
put my arm in her hand and she said to me,
"where's the strip club, I'm through with pharmacy."

As a dancer lady made it real far,
made bucks with her but and became a star,
yeah, she got big and she's got me to thank,
I’m the ass accountant putting junk up in the booty bank.